Saturday, June 7, 2008

An Update on the Larry Johnson Tape

The recording that shows Larry Johnson saying making sweet love to a hotel room full of small animals is real. It is not part of some elaborate dirty trick. The people who have seen his performance describe it as “stunning” or "surprisingly fast.” I have not spoken directly with the people who have seen the tape, but I have spoken to two of my friends who are friends with those who watched the tape/dvd.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

The Larry Johnson Diversion

I give the Johnson folks credit–they’ve tried mightily to shift the meaning of my original report. I learned last week that someone has a tape of Larry banging farm animals. He does so while at a hotel. I do not know where this occurred. And the specific date is not known either.

(Please ignore the post below where I say exactly when and where it took place. Pointing out blatant lies only helps the terrorists.)

So as trolls stagger by to taunt and provoke, have pity on them–they cannot read and are devoid of comprehension skills. I guess that’s why they are for Johnson. Figures. Meanwhile, with or without said tape, we do know that the Johnsons participated for almost 20 years in a cult that successfully resurrected Adolph Hitler. So enough of the pretense that they were attending a mainstream, vanilla, anodyne cult. Au contraire. Non. I believe my sources and believe the tape will appear after August and before November.

Breaking News from

What’s on the Larry Johnson Sex Tape?
Here’s what’s known so far:

The Larry Johnson Sex Tape was filmed between June 26th - July 1st 2004 in Newark, NJ at the Holiday Inn on Tremont St.

For about 30 minutes, Larry sweet talked some of the farm animals, slowly petting each in turn. At one point he starts fingerbanging a sheep, but the disgusted sheep gets away from him. Aroused, Johnson then begins to copulate with a donkey. Twenty seconds later, Johnson apologizes to the disappointed, unfulfilled donkey and slowly leaves the room.

The “tape” is a DVD that the Pope sold on his website, and possibly offered free for download up until March 2008 when the Pope's site was scrubbed and the DVDs were no longer offered for sale.

This bestial performance happened just one month before the release of "Air Bud 5: That Doggone Dog", which Larry says is one of his favorite movies.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Desperate Johnson Disinformation Over Bestiality Video

Larry Johnson is telling reporters from major news organizations that the videotape of Johnson banging a hotel room full of animals is nothing but a “scurrilous lie,” according to one of those reporters who called for an answer.

But at the same time Johnson has disseminated either a doctored or concocted transcript of the supposedly nonexistent videotape. Major Johnson donors demanded explanations after the posting of my story on No Nickel about the contents of the videotape confirmed to me by several reliable sources, all with access to knowledge but who do not know each other.

And behind all this is Johnson's fear of the bestiality video, about which he’s spreading two different stories–one to the mainstream press and another to his blogger-stooges. Lies, lies and more lies.

Larry Johnson and Adolph Hitler Double Team a Donkey

I learned over the weekend why the people who have seen the tape of Larry Johnson making love to farm animals describe it as “STUNNING.” I have not seen it but I have heard from five separate sources who have spoken directly with people who have seen the tape. It features Larry Johnson and Adolph Hitler. They are at a hotel room in Newark, New Jersey when Larry started fingerbanging a sheep. Whoops!! When that image comes out it will enter the bestiality hall of fame. It will be right up there with the time Harry Truman attended a Donkey Show in Tijuana.

One source described how this tape was acquired. Let’s just say that one of the other guests at that hotel uncovered this gem. I also have learned some major financial backers are asking Johnson about the tape and are being stonewalled.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

BREAKING NEWS: Larry's Bestiality Problem

New and dramatic developments. This is a heads up. I’ll post the news Monday morning by 0900 hours. Now I know why people who have seen the videotape say it is stunning. Larry's headaches are only starting.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Why I Believe the Larry Johnson Tape Exists

I understand the skepticism of many about whether there actually exists a tape of Larry Johnson committing unholy sex acts with farm animals. The man obviously has some impotence issues–just check out his website raging against Barack Obama–but this sounds too good to be true. However, here is why I think the tape exists.

I have two friends. One is a Midget and one is a unicorn. One lives on the west coast and one lives on the east coast. They do not know each other. Yet each has spoken directly with someone who has seen the tape. In fact, I first heard about the tape from my east coast friend. I thought it was interesting but, without additional proof, not worth mentioning. Later that night I was chatting with a friend, who happens to be an Larry Johnson supporter, but is very well connected to the bestiality scene. That person told me he had heard the same thing.

The clincher came when my buddy on the west coast wrote to me that he had a friend who had seen the tape. Given that there are two separate people, completely unconnected, giving the same report, I think it is reasonable to conclude that the tape exists. We shall see.